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It’s official.
The Republican Party simply does not intend to defeat President Obama in 2012. At least that’s the only explanation I can find to account for the Republican Party’s choice of successive front-runners over these past few months.
Despite having two serious Republican candidates capable of defeating President Obama (Romney & Huntsman), the new Republican Party insists on backing candidates who could never win a general election.
This ever-changing list of poll-leaders far more resembles the cast of Gilligan’s Island than a list of serious presidential contenders capable of defeating even a beleaguered sitting President.
Sara Palin, no…
Donald Trump, no…
Michele Bachmann, no..
Rick Perry, no…
Herman Cain
Let’s meet the cast. Shall we?
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We start with The Donald, our very own Thurston Howell III. Playing the role perfectly, he bragged of his billions, showed his fortitude by formally declaring Obama a Kenyan and then explained how the United States of America should invade Libya and “take their oil, damn it.” His rollercoaster rise to the top and then directly to the bottom took only about three weeks.
(Ready to embrace Romney or Huntsman? Nope.)
Next up was Michele Bachman as “Lovey” Howel III, Thurston’s intellectually-challenged wife, who reminded us that our slave-owning founding fathers fought tirelessly until slavery was abolished. As a member of the House Intelligence Committee, she also recently discovered that Libya has been secretly located in Africa and that the Swine Flu is transmitted by Democrats. Her meteoric descent from the heights to the bottom of the polls set new records.
(Now ready for Romney or Huntsman? Nope.)
The torch was then passed directly to Gilligan himself, Governor Rick Perry, who immediately channeled Bush II, and then proceeded to light himself on fire. This secession-talking, pistol-wielding-while-out-jogging Governor initiated his campaign with allegations of treason against the Fed Chair. He then advanced to debate performances that made even “W” seem articulate. Most recently, he was able to completely overshadow the grand debut of his own economic plan by renewing Birther allegations, “just for fun.” Perhaps conservative commentator Brit Hume said it best, “Perry threw up all over himself.” Another record-setting poll-leader implosion.
(Must now finally be ready for Romney or Huntsman? Not a chance.)
Finally, the most serious candidate has now overtaken them all, The Skipper, Herman Cain. And like The Skipper, he really is quite charismatic and endearing. Also like the Skipper, though, he is fully capable of immediately shipwrecking everyone on board. As a brave Captain, he is not afraid to speak his mind, letting all know – in no uncertain terms – that he is a man of principle… or at least principals … as he is fiercely pro-life and pro-choice, he would and would never negotiate with terrorists, he might electrocute or might not electrocute illegal immigrants, and he would be pleased to meet the leader of Uz-Beki-Beck-Bek-Stan-Stan, whomever that might be.
And lastly, let us not forget the ever-popular Sarah Palin, that self-proclaimed Rogue-Mama-Grizzly – a woman incapable of locating Russia on a map, or answering that trick question (“What do you read?”), or completing even one term as Governor of our least populous state. Ever-ready to help educate the lame-stream media, she is always full of unique insights – be it complex thinking about our North Korean allies or uncovering new and previously-unknown historical facts about Paul Revere.
Is this really the cast of characters the new Republican Party is choosing from to run against President Obama?
Given a population of 300 million to select from, isn’t it reasonable to assume that the nominee from the Republican Party will be the brightest, most talented, most experienced, gifted, serious, wise and proven man (or woman) around? Aren’t these the qualities we would absolutely demand in our President during such difficult times?
Herman Cain for Pizza Czar? Sure!
Herman Cain for leader of the free world? Are you nuts?
The new Republicans have bypassed all serious candidates in favor of a cast of clowns – a group of candidates that could never win a general election. Such inane thinking on the part of this new Republican Party can only mean one thing to me:
After serious soul-searching, prayer and personal reflection, the Republican Party has decided who the leader of the free world should be during these perilous times:
Barack Obama.
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the politically challenged 